faezrland, our fatherland under angels' feather. 天下主家。


bright days with driving hope, hope for new family. by benzrad
September 29, 2009, 7:01 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized
From life as it extends

our city skyline under the brilliant Sun.

From life as it extends

baby son, warren zhu, hope of China, talk to his mom in football game.

From life as it extends

a visiting girl with her pet rabbit.

From life as it extends

baby in football game.

more than a week since my last post. this week seemingly main busy with larger sized games, like "front line: fuel of war", and warez's download. i addict to warez, ie. pirate software, like 0day's release, has been a long time. the warez help me a lot when i worked for my previous job, heading design for a enterprise's cable TV branch. after left the job, i tried to keep with the daily float of pirate warez, but finally got up, for too time costing, as well as source of release in China mainly constrained within forums, which i disliked gradually, in the process of my own identity grows, till today's my web presence. u can google "benzrad" or "benzillar", my most frequent namespace, and the result will show u my cyberspace activities. i had told others many times, here i can again assert, Chinese like intimacy, while western citizen more cherish independent open relation. in general, Chinese have more dark view upon social relation, esp. the society, and indeed they behave morally inferior. that's the reason of its culture's fall in recent history. their native born belief turns darker and poorer than God in Christian. they far less respectable than a civilian of the western.

in the beginning i felt anxious about my access to warez, but i felt the open cyberspace should be the larger reality. and now i see the day. now i quite enjoy web hosted warez, like rapidshare, upload, and lots among the net disk, including demostic. i really glad to see my works in these years rewarding, one reason based on its opening and independence, like my sites and domain. i really proud of them.

this week i more times felt the leaving off my old family, and pending status i beset now. i hope i can left my baby son, warren zhu, after he takes elemental school, and sleeps on his own bed. these years, namely, has been 4 years, his parents mainly holding him aside on bed in night, except in 2006 when i lingered in the dormitory of QRRS, my once and long time employer, a state-owned enterprise, just after i fired for divorce with my baby's mother. i all time praying for a new life, for i think from the start the family of my baby's mother is evils, and never fit for me, far less my Royal in God's glory. my baby's mother let me leave my baby several days after his birth, and the evils family, all left to be female, never enjoy sun light and kept in dark from me, including its financial situation which they likely close-mouthed most. in these years, i never gave up finding myself a new life, a new home for my baby to let him enjoy which house he likes to stay. i also felt i deserve a better routine life, esp. better food and enjoyable life style.

these days i sometimes felt gloomy, esp when its indeed cloudy. i reviewed sometimes my depressed love on beauty, on spiritual knowledge, i felt God wouldn't let me equipped with such a subtle eyes and mind of beauty while don't let me enjoy it and hold in constant reach. i believe God forges me and my beloved, just a case of time in search.

these days i noticed a tall neaty girl walked alone the road of QRRS, my once and long time employer, in its rush time. she likely a new employee of the company. i like her temperament. she likely has a long legs, and slim figure. my heart pumps more air and pray more deeper when i saw her each time, and i at once connect her with my missing girl zhou, the love ignite my web search and beginning of most of my cyberspace presence. i pray God now let me reunite with my beloved, and shift my life span toward a new landscape.

yes, that's it, i wouldn't leak more on it. only God know why i put my hope in it. i live for my pray, for my hope, for my bliss from God, my dad.

See and download the full gallery on posterous

Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly…



hope of reunite by benzrad
September 17, 2009, 3:59 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized


baby bathed in warm Autumn dusk by benzrad
September 14, 2009, 7:53 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Embedded media — click here to see it.


baby son bathed in warm Autumn dusk from be21zh on Vimeo.



 

  baby just haunted outside with his grandma, while i busy with posting his recent paintings, as well as my recent photos.then his mother bathed him even there is a boy student receiving ema's tutorial here. i dislike ema don't pay attention to privacy but God shows me it doesn't matter.its a warm Autumn dusk, bright and dry sunshine through the window of our balcony cast a loveable and moving family peace in the house.

 

Ps: i also just got showered in public bathroom. a nice weekend.

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baby bathed.

查看更多精彩图片
baby in bath

From Heading toward peace&grace


From Heading toward peace&grace


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Posted via email from birdous, angels at homeland. 天下羽帝。



baby bathed in warm Autumn dusk by benzrad
September 14, 2009, 7:53 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Embedded media — click here to see it.


baby son bathed in warm Autumn dusk from be21zh on Vimeo.



 

  baby just haunted outside with his grandma, while i busy with posting his recent paintings, as well as my recent photos.then his mother bathed him even there is a boy student receiving ema's tutorial here. i dislike ema don't pay attention to privacy but God shows me it doesn't matter.its a warm Autumn dusk, bright and dry sunshine through the window of our balcony cast a loveable and moving family peace in the house.

 

Ps: i also just got showered in public bathroom. a nice weekend.

查看更多精彩图片
baby bathed.

查看更多精彩图片
baby in bath

From Heading toward peace&grace


From Heading toward peace&grace


View all

Get your own

View all

Get your own

Posted via email from IIDChina, 我帝中华

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baby bathed in warm Autumn dusk by benzrad
September 14, 2009, 5:58 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

Embedded media — click here to see it.

baby son bathed in warm Autumn dusk from be21zh on Vimeo .

 

  baby just haunted outside with his grandma, while i busy with posting his recent paintings, as well as my recent photos.then his mother bathed him even there is a boy student receiving ema’s tutorial here. i dislike ema don’t pay attention to privacy but God shows me it doesn’t matter.its a warm Autumn dusk, bright and dry sunshine through the window of our balcony cast a loveable and moving family peace in the house.

 

Ps: i also just got showered in public bathroom. a nice weekend.

View all

Get your own

View all

Get your own

See and download the full gallery on posterous

Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly…

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baby bathed in warm Autumn dusk by benzrad
September 13, 2009, 7:38 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

baby just haunted outside with his grandma, while i busy with posting his recent paintings, as well as my recent photos.then his mother bathed him even there is a boy student receiving ema's tutorial here. i dislike ema don't pay attention to privacy but God shows me it doesn't matter.its a warm Autumn dusk, bright and dry sunshine through the window of our balcony cast a loveable and moving family peace in the house.

Ps: i also just got showered in public bathroom. a nice weekend.

Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly…

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road toward peace&grace by benzrad
September 13, 2009, 2:30 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

2 months passed since my return from my hometown, Zhudajiu, Central China. i quite enjoyed the peace in office, even the place rampant abnormal persons, esp. dogs on desk facing&backing me.God just shown me i can’t rest on harmony.i saw my works here preparing baby more enjoyable pc games rewarding.baby grows so smart that my only complain is that i too cozy to blog about my mission here on the earth.recently i just finished reading to Nash’s biography.that remind me of baby can be idle in the infinite possibilities of his road on this planet. however, God let me more and more at sure that his arrangement the best arrangement.Sigh! God, i really enjoy my life!

It has been a series of bright sunny days, since the night i told baby his mission and the history of world as well as of China.it then lately in night, i summon my speech with this closure: the world to come surely under changing, its ur task to make the different. next morning it drizzled, so auspicious! i read in office, and left office earlier with a box of bottle water from the highest mountains in southwestern China, Tibet, dispatched by my  once and long time employer, a state-owned enterprise.in the later afternoon after i read some time at home, it started to turn into brilliant sunshine.

so many moving moment in my life and my talk with God, with my second wife, Masheng, from Japan. i never be surer at this moment that me is the best blessed, and my life is the most glorious on the earth.

Ok, time to bit farewell now. i love my girls in praying for our gathering. i love my world to emerging.

See and download the full gallery on posterous

Posted via email from benzyrnill, set to fly, like dragon fly…

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